Christmas Eve

twas the night before Christmas and it feels like another day...
why you ask... cause I'm almost 40 childless just finished 2 jumbo glasses of wine contemplating another but know I won't cause I will have a hellified headache (no spell check I DID NOT MEAN qualified!!)it's snowing and the little baby Jesus was in the manager right about now over 2K years ago about to be swaddled well after He gets borned that is!!!

my mom is such a gangsta... her just having had her shoulder replaced ass told her roommate at the rehab hospital that she had a turkey neck and to mind her own damn business!! and for her to WHEEL her over so she could punch the woman. It's not funny.... dammit YES IT IS!!! See this is why I act the way I do I get it honest I DO!!

LMAO!!!

my littlest niece whose hair is ALL over the placed in her light brown/blond mixed chick curls said to me yesterday 'I like your hair' which I guess would be a compliment if I didn't look like I just stuck my find in a light socket.

i made some party wingettes for myself and I feel as though if I eat one more I'm gonna be sick but they were SOOO GOOD!! so really the contemplation is more wings AND more wine, both of which I just need to say NO!

...that's it!

lots of random!!

i'm going to label each section because you know I can keep wrting a sentence well after it shoulda had stopped...

THE GYM

I just recently joined a gym, well rather I joined a 60 day program at a gym and they are consistently trying to sell me on getting the year package. I keep insisting that I’m not a ‘gym person’ and the little skinny chick who signed me up had this perplexed look on her face like ‘what does THAT mean’. Well my petite young friend it means I will be ALL IN for exactly 4 weeks and then I will find ever excuse in the book not to go. What is driving me now though is this spare tire that quite literally came out of nowhere. I have never been a small chick (no never); I have always had a belly but it used to be cute (or at least maybe in my mind it was LOL). It is so far from being cute right now let me tell ya!! And the girls, oh those would be these heavy ass breast that just hang (I could be real crude and say the men LOVE them, but most of the time they are clueless as to how to make them truly happy, and being a drill sergeant (left, NO MY OTHER LEFT) can get tiresome), they have gotten even more plumper. So I am working with a trainer 2 times a week and do cardio 3 times a week for 60 days. I maintained myself during the Thanksgiving break which is a VERY good thing (more on that later) under the circumstances and of course all the crap I ate. This gym is a local/regional gym and has 2 women only gyms and like 5 co-ed. I didn’t realize how comfortable I was at the women only gym until I went to the co-ed gym. I was excited at the prospect of seeing boys!! That put a huge grin on my face until I got there and there were boys there. So the energy there was so very different. All the body building dudes (I pick things up and put them down...) yammering on about whatever; all the skinny housewives in tiny shorts and all the young looking boys lifting to bulk up for football. I am not a self conscious person, but there I felt myself tugging at my now too short shirt and pulling up my too tight spandex (I know spandex is supposed to be form fitting but it felt extra tight). And I felt watched like a dirty old man was sitting there watching my every move. There was one guy I did lock eyes with him and gave him my ‘STOP LOOKING AT ME’ glare. Now there were a few cuties but then I felt like the dirty old lady looking at the young boys : )

The classes… OK so I have taken 3 classes so far and is always pure hilarity. The first class the woman was a sub and it is clear they do not let her teach many classes. She had this snake/body wave move that was her go to move which was ridiculous. The thing about me, is I will try anything and I will smile throughout the class mostly because I am laughing to myself either AT myself or the teacher, or the other people in the class cause there is always something to laugh about. So she was up there losing count doing the snake to the left then the right and because this was my first class my body was glad to be moving but class was really bad. I meant to ask what her name was so I didn’t take her again. Class #2 taught by the owner of the gyms which I thought was cool. She is well into her… hole up let me google real quick...well couldn't find exact age, but let’s say her 50’s and so full of energy. NOW this class was the Zumba class which is a worldwide phenomenon. I even have a friend who enjoyed it so much she is now an official Zumba instructor. So this is at the women only gym and the women in this class are of the older variety, but the kicker was they all had the booty scarf thing wrapped around them like what the belly dancers wear. And they were all off beat LOL. This was not my first Zumba class but it is always interesting to see how different instructors do things. It was a good class. Thanks to this class my new song is ‘I work out! wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle’ by #LMFAO The third class… I might need to mention all of my instructors are white ladies, so when they do something with any form or rhythm it throws me off for a second, not that my white sistas can’t get funky!! LOL So class #3 I’m standing there feeling watched in the co-ed gym and the instructor comes up and starts talking to the regulars about thanksgiving and eating and carpools and whatever else. She turns off the light and puts on this house song with a little techno flair that I actually knew so that was good to get me in the groove. So the class was supposed to be heavy on the choreography but her moves were a little, damn I can’t even think of a good word but they weren’t hard move just cumbersome. So since I was at the gym the night before I was a bit stiff so there was no dropping like it was hot or warm. OH and I need to point out also, I’m not a turner. If the move requires a turn to the left or right then I will try it, but if you just threw a spin or turn in there just for the heck of it, I am going to do a 2 step. I don’t know if I get dizzy or if it just make sense to me. Often I’m in a class muttering to myself ‘Oh I aint doing that!’ And that was me in that class. She said she had a lower back issue but then she kept telling us to GET LOW!! Yeah… no I aint doing all that!!

**UPDATE** so I took class #4 tonight and it really reminded me how flexible I USED to be!! Actually this one was my favorite so far maybe because the teacher asked me my name and kept saying HEY WHAT ARE YOU DOING CHICK? and she did modifiers for everything she did which is what I need. I also should mention I'm not a jumper. The girls just can't handle all that extra motion. So if I can do a side step or march in place that is what I do. She was British and skinny and fun (not that you have to be any combination of this... it just worked for her!) OH and yesterday the butt scarf janglers were so off I lost count when I was on the machines!!


MY HAIR

India Arie’s song ‘I am not my hair’ really resonated with me and it still does. When it first came out I think I identified with it on the level of weaves; like you don't have to attach fake hair to your head to make yourself feel better. What I didn't include were braids. That too is something you attach to your hair, but for some reason in my head people know braids are fake, getting a weave is perpetrating a fraud. But my view of the song and hair has changed over the years. I made a music mix (oh yeah I'm a part time DJ, mostly at the end of the year as a means to sum up my year in music AND as an inexpensive Christmas gift!) for someone who I thought was going through some ‘hair issues’. I honestly don’t know if it was received in the vein it was given because I had to explain why I put each song on the CD. But the reason for ‘I am not my hair’ was to remind that we are much bigger than our hair style, how it’s cut, if it’s relaxed, colored, what have you. What troubles me is that sometimes I feel like I AM MY HAIR! I got my hair braided because the cut I got back at the end of the summer was just bad. I wanted it to be short and funky and it just so wasn't. So now as I rock the braids which need to be taken out soon I sit here wondering what do I do next? Relaxer or not relaxer? Wig? More braids so my hair can grow out some more? Weave?! Oh wait I am NOT my hair so it doesn't matter right? But it does. It matters! I had an intention with this but I severely lost my train of thought!! LMAO

THE BATHROOM

I do not like bathroom banter. We do not need to chat, I don’t care what outfit or shoes you got on, I just need to get in and get out hopefully not completely stink up the place OR smell whoever was before me. So this morning I’m in there trying to put up my braided hair that was massively crooked. So the lady come out of the stall and sees my hands up and says ‘Oh I thought you were praying!’ I start laughing and say ‘no... well I do need to be doing that too but my hair was crooked so I’m trying to uncrook it.’ She starts laughing hysterically and I know the people in the hallway are wondering what the heck was going on in there. Sometimes bathroom banter is not so bad LOL.

NO APPLE

I am convinced that me and a handful of people are the onliest ones that have not drank the Apple Kool-Aid. I sat and watched yet another accessory that will help people see the screen for the iPad. So not only have you spent about 800 bucks for the actual iPad, then you gotta turn around and buy extra shiznit so that it’ll work better. Like a keyboard, and a cover and speakers and... the list goes on. Why not just get a laptop??

NEW STUFF?

I can't remember if I posted this so I'll add to it and pretend liek it's fresh even if it's not!! LOL

YOUTUBE (ie LIFESAVER)
I am now addicted to YouTube! I get on people’s page and then just stay allllll day. My current obsession is Kid Fury who taught me that you have to fight shade WITH SHADE!! Which I must admit I am practicing with all these shady mofos that I work with. I said HELLO not give m your wallet you silly bitch! And then there is RoomieLoverFriend which I admit the story line is a bit for the 20 somethings... but they keep me coming back!!

I'M A FOODIE

(((You really can’t mess up a sandwich, I mean come on it’s just bread, meat, maybe some cheese and maybe some lettuce and tomato. But you absolutely can improve on it.))) It has come to my attention that I not only love food but I enjoy savoring it. I'm a foodie! Taking a bite to see what the flavor combination is going to be. When I cook throwing things into the mix because I know garlic and cilantro will go good together. So it baffles me when folks do not share the same adoration as I do. If I go out I don’t want chicken strips. I want chicken brined in citrus for 2 days then roasted to perfection with rosemary vinaigrette sauce (ew I just made that up but it sounds GOOD!!). I like basic food kicked up a notch. I went to the Gypsy Queen food truck this past Saturday and had not just the crab cake cone, but the CRAB CAKE CONE WITH BACON!! OMG it was so good!! They were parked behind a church that was having a craft fair. I attempted to go in and see the crafts, but there were to many people and babies so I headed for the truck. So after about a 1/2 hour in line, when I finally get my food I do a little happy dance and savored my food! So today I go to a chain with a co-worker who would probably kill me if she knew I mentioned her and had the chicken ceasar she raved about. Uhhh let me just say the spongeyness of the chicken should have immediately turned me off but I ate it and I truly don't see what the fuss was. It was your basic chain restaurant chicken ceasar. I will stick to my gut from now on!! LOL

THANKSGIVING DRAMA

So my mom fell down the steps at her house, fractured her shoulder had 1 surgery where the pins did not hold, (hospital #1)had another surgery (hospitals #2 & #3 because UPMC has ALL the hospitals in the Burgh on lock so even if your room is in 1, the doctors may be coming from another and then the surgery might be in yet another... but they are all connected by those handy dandy walking bridges) where they replaced the whole thing she is in a rehab hospital (#4) doing PT and OT twice a day is a bit fussy about the whole thing but she got some GOOOOD drugs so all in all for a 70 yr old chick she is doing alright! And that was the Friday before Thanksgiving. We intended to go the Wednesday before but that is what had happened so we went that Saturday. Now I know it is alot but I was and AM thanking LBJ for just the fracture. My grandparent's neighbor fell down the steps and died. It was so tragic and then his kids found him in the buff because he had just gotten out of the shower. That is just SO HORRIBLE. So I'll take the inconvenience of a shoulder replacement ANY DAY!! Her spirits are good!! Now what needs to happen is my siblings and I need to be on the same page and book for what needs to happen next.

I must say I do not enjoy cooking lots and lots of food. I like a theme and cooking a few things and having a signature drink. That's my thing. But it seemed like we (and I'm using 'we' lightly since my sister did the bulk of the cooking) cooked for tons of people and it really was just a few of us. The point was to keep is small, but I still think we went over board. When you watch those cooking shows they have like 2 sides and it looks really good so why do we need to have 7 sides? Wait am I exaggerating? mac and cheese, mashed potatoes, greens, green beans, stuffing (or dressing), mashed SWEET potato, potato salad (damn we had alot of taters!!), corn pudding, deviled (or angel) eggs, cranberry sauce, gibletless (LOL*insider*) gravy, olives, bean dip, spinach dip (ok I have gone into the relish tray), chips and pretzels OH sweet potato pie and apple peach pie and ice cream. YEAH THATS A HELLA LOT!!ijs not to mention the turkey and ham (well but the ham was small and we only did a turkey breast)

THE END... for now :)

political random & other random

In 1992 I voted for the first time. I can’t remember which fraternity (probably the Alpha’s) did a voter registration drive on the campus of Virginia State University and I registered. Because that’s what you do when you turn 18, you register and then you vote. I was so very excited when the right Rev. Jesse Jackson came to our campus to head up yet another voter registration. The rally was held in the open space behind Foster Hall (the student union) and the really handsome man with the short fro who sings for all those types of events sang. I was moved to tears. And then Jesse said GET ON THE BUS!! So even though I had already registered and had a very important class in less than an hour I was stirred, ready and willing to get on the bus to go register… BUT I didn’t! I’ll never forget that moment. My mother who is a retired social studies teacher always made an impact on being a good citizen and doing you civic duty. So it was never a question of whether or not to vote, just like it wasn't an option to not go to college. Those were just givens. I was probably well into my 20’s before I realized that not everyone’s parents are like that. Even to this day when I meet people who are able bodies crime free and yet do not vote. I almost want to be like ‘is ya crazy or is ya stupid!!!’ It absolutely galls me that 2008 was the first time so many people, especially Black folks, voted. Like all of a sudden because the choice was for a Black man to be president you decided that now is a convenient time to exercise your right. I mean, I’m not mad, but it is very interesting to me. In 1992 when Bill Clinton was on Letterman, and Arsenio it just sealed the deal that he was the coolest man alive. On the day I walked to the elementary school near my dorm and voted. I was excited and happy to be official!! Fast forward to 2008 when it was cold, and just 4 years prior when I attempted to get John Kerry in office, there was no line. I was in and out and no one really had much to say about the whole process. But in 2008 there was an energy the spurred everyone to be on one accord. I didn’t buy any tee-shirts, but I do think someone gave me an Obama button. I was almost afraid to wear it for fear it would jinx the process. At this point in my life all of my grandparents had been deceased and my father, but my mother shared the same awe as I did. On that night we sat on the phone well after 11 after the official announcement had been made that Barack Obama was the 44th President of the United States of America we were unable to put into words the magnitude of what was really happening. The Obama Family came onto the screen and tears flowed. Flowed for everyone that came before us who suffered to even be heard all the women and men and not just people who looked like me, people who were interested in everyone being equal and having a voice. So again fast forward to 2012 on election day as I sit at my desk not doing any work, but encouraged by all of my online friends and family who are energized! Some of them voted early. Some of them are for or against various measures on the ballot. But what important is people are talking about it and that makes my heart so very full and happy!

Ok… now onto the shenanigans at the polls!! So my neighbors are not very attractive, in general. I kept looking around for a cutie to get in line but alas, it didn’t happen. The really big dude behind me was not very chatty and had a red face. I wanted to engage him in conversation but he really didn’t wanna talk. The 2 couples in front of me, well one almost knocked me down to get to steps in front of me, the other had snacks, but I resisted the urge to ask for any. I was glad I made the decision to make coffee. I was hungry also, but I really thought getting there at 6:45(ish) would mean I would be in and out. SO that was not the case. I had to stand in line, but only for about 1 ½ hours which was not bad at all. Basically there was only 1 bonnet which I was expecting more. On any given day I can see about 8-10. There was this baby who looked like Big Baby from Toy Story. And then there were these 2 guys who were talking about not being that old but they were not good representative for early 40 somethings. So what confused me the most is that there was this big thing about having a photo ID. Now this may have been in other states, but it was news across the country nonetheless. So as I attempted to had the pollster my drivers license he looks at the screen and says ‘how do you spell you name?’ And I say uuuhh… just like it says here on my license. So perplexed I say ok so you don’t need my ID?!?! Cause the woman who is sitting near you almost snatched it out my hands for the primary. SO OKAY that kinda baffled me.

I am so tired of the political commercials. This is one thing I will be happy to go away as of later today/tomorrow. Although my favorite one was Mayor Rawlings-Blake and Jonathan Ogden ‘West Virginia, Don’t make me send Jonathan Ogden over there’. This was for the gambling expansion.

Ok so, I am a proponent of staying in you lane and I veered out of mine last night. After seeing everyone’s dismay on facebook about T-Dawg or T-dog (not sure which is right) being killed off Walking Dead I say to myself SELF why are you missing out on this teevee adventure? I’ve been hearing about this show, so I go to my on-demand only to find out, this is the 3rd season! I don’t start shows if I missed the pilot let alone the 3rd season. But I’m like well I can start and if it’s good I’ll get the 1st 2 on Netflix or something. So for the 1st 5-10 minutes there is NO dialogue. You just see people coming into a house trying to see if any zombies are in there and they are looking for food. Tame enough right? So then the zombies come out of NOWHERE and the people run and jump into cars and motorcycles and leave. At one point there is another story line where this Black Xena princess woman is fighting off the zombies. There are 2 chained zombies with no mouths in this store or something and I’m like HOLE UP WTF IS GOING ON HERE?!?! So in general zombies get shot, bashed in the head, head cut completely off and just they die! And then one who the old dude thought was dead grabs his leg and basically bites him. Well then instead of killing this guy which is what you do when someone gets infested is to kill that person RIGHT?!?! So they proceed to chop off his leg and THAT is when I said ENOUGH! I have had enough!! And went back to my on-demand and watched Bob’s Burgers which is so freaking hilarious!! The kids started working on a weed farm which they thought was a blueberry farm… WHEW I might have to watch it again!!

I love that my iPod has a good mix! I was rocking out to Radio Head and then Nas came on and then Faith!!

So I haven’t bartended much this year and my story are really lacking. But I DID bartend last week for a friend’s birthday party. His ‘people’ are not big drinkers so I really did not expect them to do much damage. BUT THEY DID! But what was really funny is… well ok let me back up. His party was a masquerade party. Just wear a mask, not a costume. So this Queen came in with a toga type sheath thingamabob with a gold leaf Olympic like thing on his head! Everyone was like DA HELL HE GOT ON?!?!? Along with his house boy whose costume no one could really figure out which also did not have a mask. I had a mask that I had had for years so the feathers were going every which way.

I am no officially addicted to YouTube! I have more subscriptions than I care to admit. But some days I just need that mindlessness. I am amazed how much content people really have on this. I mean there are whole series of scripted shorts that are on here. I am partial to the vlogs… or video blogs, like Funky Dineva, Kid Fury, Issa Rae’s RatchetPiece Theater and Jenna Marbles. But the series I love are The Mis-Adventures of an Awkward Black Girl (created by Issa Rae), And now the Unwritten Rules, and Number. These are the ‘black’ shows. What is even more hilarious are the comments. People get so amped about what someone else said and there is a great ease at calling someone everything but the child of God. I don’t say not a thing I wouldn’t to your face! It doesn’t even occur to me to hide behind the computer.

3 in one!!

I wrote this part a few weeks ago and I aint changing the tense...

Some days I just about bust a lid because folks do not read the email I have sent them. So I send a message to my bank about a feature and they send me to the exact location I already looked and didn’t find the answer hence I sent an email to get further information!! I sent an email to a manager and said “when you get a chance…” so that means DON’T read and respond right now if NOW is not a good time. It means when you get a chance to fully read, comprehend, and are able to respond then get back to me and let me know what you think. I too am guilty of this. I will skim an email and then just miss the whole point and respond. But then once I realize my error, I let the person know and re-respond. And saying please and thank you are niceties that need to good in every email. It just is common courtesy and good business practice. Also, phone manners are so very necessary. I had a manager who often complained about her director not saying good morning or thank you but she was notorious for saying not even hello but YEAH, I need to speak to… It grated my last nerve to be on any kind of conference call with her. It also bugs me when the folks don’t greet the security guards. You job is not that important nor are you that focused that you can’t say hello. I sit near a bunch of ‘office’ people, I guess I’m a ‘cubicle’ person now and there is only 1 of the 6 people who will actually go out of her way to speak. What’s funny is as a consultant I probably make more than them and I’m way cuter!!

Are we just a society of un-nice people?!? We want what we want so quickly that we can’t even bother to just be nice to each other? I mean I truly hope that is not the state of affairs. But I think we are slowly but surely losing basic social skills. We put on a front online and say whatever it is we need to say but then face to face we don’t know how to interact. I see this mostly for the younger generations. But even folks my age act like they can’t put the phone down or have to constantly check stuff.

I am taking prednisolone (a steroid) drops for my left eye and I just finished reading on WebMD, you know the foremost authority on all things medical, that people who have take these drops experience the same as the oral drug which is mood swings, rage, and hungry all the time which is NOT a good thing since I already have rage issues. The hunger part is interesting because I knew I couldn’t start my day without eating this morning. I kept trying to rationalize with myself that if I came in I could just go to the caf and get some food. But the next thing I knew I was in the Dunkin Donut drive through line AND they got my order correct even though I questioned the lady. My pumpkin donut was really good.

I am playing random songs… DMX just came on. I really be wondering who he’s talking about. Y’ALL GON MAKE ME LOSE MY MIND UP IN HERE UP IN HERE!!!

I wrote this section last week...

If you say you don’t watch a show and can’t provide any valuable insight I am DONE with the conversation!! This happened a lot when I was obsessed with Lost. Folks would try to say oh yeah I saw like 2 episodes and THEN have the gall the absolute GALL to try and spar with me. No ma’am… NO!!! Or they say something like oh yeah I used to watch it. Now for me ER just got boring, so I was one of those people who said yep I used to watch it but I don’t now. Sometimes I just have to wonder in silence about whatever until I find someone who actually knows what I’m talking about. Take for instance Lost Girl on SyFy, no one I know watches it and honestly I have fell off because it kept going and I got stuck somewhere in season 1. I probably would have a field day if I go to one of those ComicCons. It would be a nerd fest but somehow I think I would fit right in LOL. Hmmm maybe I should join one of those blogs? And I could be all random and anonymous as I am.

The Nissan commercial where it beeps to let the man know he is going to far is hilarious. It beeps and he’s like OH OK too far!! I just ‘got’ the Target falling into fall commercial, they fall from summer to fall… I was like OOOooohhh I get it now the other day.

Like assholes, everyone has an opinion about EVERYTHING!! Which can be very tiring sometimes. Let’s just agree to disagree okay?

Sometimes it takes a lot of effort to do nothing!!

I just let a little girl with a bad weave and about 3 different shades of hair cut my hair at the Hair Cuttery. She actually listened to what I said and cut what I needed cut. I am just so sick of people not listening to me!! My current hair stylist who I LOVE really dropped the ball this last go round. When she was done she held up the mirror and I said to her is this what you thought I had said I wanted?! Followed quickly by “you’re lucky my hair grows fast” cause what I didn’t say but I so wanted to was is “cause I’ma about to kick your ass for this mess you just did!!!” I am such a gansta!! LOL

Courtesy flush is so that the stink don’t linger. It’s for you as much as everyone else entering the facilities.


I wrote this part tonight 10/15/12...

I am listening to the debate in the background. My mind is made up about the President. OBAMA ALL DAY ERR DAY!!! I keep trying to hear what Mittens has to say but it sounds like the adults in Charlie Brown... Woock woock woock woock!! Here in Maryland we got like 50eleven questions that we have to vote Yay or Nay on. I keep waiting for my specimen ballot so that I can read them in full. Honestly on Nov 6 (or earlier if I do the early vote thing) It's gon be a quick Yes or No and I want to make educated decisions about the 'Questions'

This time of year i go into pumpkin MANIA!! I bought pumpkin soup, waffle and pancake mix AND pumpkin butter from the good Trader Joe's just today!! And then I try to hoard stuff like the waffle mix because in a few months they will take it away and I will be sad :(

Revolution is a new show on NBC where the people are living in the future and the electricity has just gone out... BLIP it is no more! No TV, no cars, no iPods, no running water... anything powered by electricity is gone. And as much as I like the sci fi stuff I can't help but just ponder the smell. They gotta be some funky folks!! I mean if all you have to rely on is fresh water and you live in the middle of nowhere how do you stay clean?!? And who makes the soap so you can stay clean?? And I won't even go into the whole women's cycle thing because it just boggles my mind. And then there is the transportation thing. I get that there aren't car, but why come no one has a bike? Or skateboard? Or scooter?!? OR those damn heelies (which I still do want btw)?!? Everyone just walks around with their bow and arrow AND who makes the clothes and if food is in shortage HOW do fat people even exist?? like Aresnio... things that make you goo hmmmm...

my cat has an a fixation with paper and because my house is a wreck she has ample opportunity to lay on it, wipe the kitty litter off on it, and scoot it to different locations around the 1st floor of the house...

I took great pleasure in watching the foreigners in Florida at the mall look befuddled and confused when dealing with American money! I just now know they feel like how I felt when in Europe and trying to figure out how the hell the Euro worked. Well not 'how it worked' but more what it was worth without getting completely taken advantage of. My favorite story is when I was in Greece and the shop keeper said I need 25 cents and I handed him and American quarter and his hand went limp like I stuck a pile of poop in his hand! Well excuuuuuuuuuuuse me Mr. Man!! the $ I know aint worth much but did you really have to act like that?? So this weekend in the Ben & Jerry's line (cause who doesn't like an overpriced ice cream cone) the B&J little dude said you owe me $20.80 and the guy from... let's just say Italy holds a 20, a 10, and a few singles in his hand like uuuuhhhh uuuuhhh... thank goodness B&J dude was honest, he took the 20 and a single and gave him change. He really could have taken the 10 and the man would not have known the difference, but that is bad karma.

So after a few stores on the 'high end' side of Sawgrass Mill outlet mall I sat my happy ass down and had a great time people watching. So this mall has the airport luggage baskets so people could roll around their goods. Folks were shopping like their life depended on it. I had my lil bag from Coach and was slightly pissed when they added tax. I usually go to the outlet store in Delaware, so if it's 80 buck it's 80 bucks, not 80 plus 6% tax. And for some reason I could not wrap my head around paying $200 for a purse... so I didn't. I'm a QVC chick I like flex pay!! Somehow paying on something for 6 months just sounds more right! Now don't get me wrong there were some thing I coulda had bought. But like at the Michael Kors store the little girl got way too close for comfort. NO I don't need help I'm good. Go stand you happy ass over there and let me breathe!! And i'm not big on other people's initials. At least Tory Burch has a T on most thing which is my initial.

I am always mad when I realize there is NO MORE WINE!! Well no more white wine I do have a few bottle of red... but I already started drinking white and what really needs to happen is I need to go to bed!!

random hooky day

I woke up this morning at 5:45 a full 1/2 hour before my alarm goes off and I was not a happy camper... but I also wasn't mad either because I was rested. So I go to open my eyes and the left one is oozing something. I have been having an issue of redness and not only did I diagnosed myself with pink eye but I also started taking antibiotics as a proactive approach. So there I lay and pull out a tissue, dab my eye and throw it away because WebMD had told me that pink eye was highly contagious and you don't want to infect the other eye. So at work I been sanitizing myself silly washing my hands (even more)and just trying not to touch anything that could infect either me in the other eye or anyone else. So this morning as the ooze comes out and i'm in pain and it's sensitive to light and there is this fuzzy film over my eye AND I look like a complete one red eyed freak I was like OH SHIT I can't go to work like this and be infecting the world. So I called my manager and co-worker and let them know that if i did come in it would be late in the day. So I go to the appointment ready for them to tel me it was pink eye, get some more antibiotics and be on my merry way. Well no, it never can be that easy for me!! My mom has eye issues, but it never occurred to me that I would inherit that. I mean I have jacked up eyes and astigmatism which I never feel like the eye doctors other than Dr. Mike and the one in VA (I forgot his name) get correct. So Dr.uuummm it started with a W but honestly I keep thinking they said Wazowski and then I kept saying to myself MIKE WAZOWSKI!! You know from Monster Inc. (stay with me). So anyway he and his nurse/tech who had on this horrible perfume AND can you say to someone can you please leave cause you are offending my nose right now!?? No I guess you can't... He says something to her in medical-eze and I said Ok I need ENGLISH!! So he tells me I have retenitis and uveitis which are both inflammations and I will have to do drops every 1/2 hour for the next 3 days while I'm awake. So it's the middle layer of my eye that is inflamed and has protein build up on it. So it's not contagious, I didn't do anything to cause it except get older. He said it was pretty common. So Stink Tech printed out some information and went on my way. So I'm in the car with my classy dialated plastic sunglasses debating do I go to work or do I just go home? And then I started having this pity party like WHOA IS ME!! I even think a tear feel as I conjure images up of my eye never healing and then eventually just falling out! I can get real dramatic real fast LOL But just as fast as i can get dramatic, I can get it together.

So last night I was watching Eat St on the Cooking network and they are showing the Gypsy Queen Cafe food truck. Now normally all the food trucks they feature are in Santa Monica or Ontario or everywhere but Baltimore!! So I was excited and they did the 'this is what we have' and I sat on my couch and salivated. So I had said last night I'ma take a few hours off from work one day and go find the truck. Well in the midst of my pity party (see above) I was like... well i have chicken and salad I'll just go home I don't need to find the truck today even though I had already mapped it and knew they were gonna be on Hopkins campus from 11-2. And then I said HOLE UP!! I can go find the truck and then go to work! So I went got cash and went on my mission. Baltimore has this whole Food Truck phenomenon going on and I have been to a few events called 'The Gathering' where they all park in a central location and you are just in food heaven. I have seen this truck and I have seen the line wrap around, but for whatever reason I never made it to this truck. I have made it to Grr Cheese Truck where I had this wonderful Caribbean mango grilled cheese sandwich made with guyere(sp?) cheese! And then there is the Chicken and Waffle truck which has... well chicken and waffles but they are so good!! And I have dreams about them. And then there is the Cupcake Runner which has... well cupcakes run by one of my friends/former co-workers. It's always a nice sweet end to the day. So on the TEE VEE last night they show this crab cone from Gypsy Queen. It's a waffle cone filled with fries topped with old bay and then topped with the crabcake which is then topped with this aoli sauce. And you see all these doctors and nurses and techs in scrubs at either University of MD hospital or Johns Hopkins lining up to get either that OR that macaroni and cheese cone OR the fried soft shell crab sandwich. Everyone looks happy! SO TODAY after I talk myself into going to find the truck I got the crab cone. Let me point out that this is my time of the month that I am PMS'ing so I cry literally at the drop of any random hat. So the lady in the truck gives me the cone-o-food and after one bite I have to fight back tears it is so freaking delicious!! So instead I nod and point and say this is really good. I go to my illegally parked car and do loud mmmmm's and ahhhh's!! 1/2 way through this culinary adventure I want to get out of the car and find a sign like one of those sign dudes and point people in the direction of this truck!! The only and I do mean ONLY thing that would have made it better is if I had a jumbo 1/2 n 1/2 which is one of the few b-more things that I have adopted! The crab cake was CRAB with not much filler. It was just so good! and I am anxious to go try err thang on the menu!!

On my quest to find the truck today I passed Hopkins Hospital and a woman who is clearly a patient is standing on the sidewalk in her hospital gown and house shoes and is coughing up a few lungs. Now try as I might NOT to stare... that's exactly what I kept doing. And the more I stared the more she looked back at me and the more I kept willing the light to turn green. It did finally after like 20 minutes LOL

I am convinced that if my cat could talk, every other word would be bitch. So I got her some food that she likes and eats ALL of it and on the first day she looked at me as if to say 'FINALLY bitch you got me some good ass food!!'

My office is a campus set near a lot of trees and there is a family or families of deer that live and eat in the back of the parking lot. So one day, there were about 4 deer eating grass and one sees me in the car and then starts running around like OH SHIT SHE CAN SEE US!!! Now this must have been a young deer because the other deer look at here like BITCH CALM DOWN!! And then she does! I'm assuming she was a she cause there were no antlers.

There was a stink bug in my car the other day. I had to pull over because if I swiped at him and he landed on my leg there would have been an accident involving me and a pile-up of cars. They are indeed the stupidest bugs. I mean a roach, an ant, a WHATEVER scurries when you try to kill it. Today one is walking across my TV and I go get it with a magazine to flush it. It's almost like they say oh you want me to get on that magazine and NOT fly away even though I got perfectly good wings?!?! NO PROBLEM!! Then they swim around in the toilet like DAMN I GOTTA GET OUTTA HERE!! THAT BITCH SET ME UP!!! LOL

I think ima go get an eyepatch and say ARGH alot even though we are way passed 'talk like a pirate' day. Hell I can barely see out the left eye... that's a good idea

i aint got time for all that!!

I have just been in a complaining space. And I HATE that!! No one wants to hear that. Hell I hate thinking it!! So my blogs have been a little scarce lately. I wrote this long one out and then re-read it and it was just so dark and full of rage. And that’s not me so let me rebegin (hmm word does not like this word... but Words With Friends do so I’ma keep using it!!)!

Actually today is rather gloomy, but as soon as I put my obnoxious rain hat on I feel better. I got it the summer I was working back in DC and I saw it at the 9West store. It made me think of my grandmother! She always had a ridiculous hat for rainy days and supermarket days; ANY day! She was what folks call people a hoarder but we didn't really realize it then. She kept everything and it was a fight to have her throw away the smallest things. And true to form her hat collection (and shoe, and make-up, and perfume, and clothes) was big. I miss her so much! It’s funny the small things that remind me of my family that has passed away. On Friday I looked down at my outfit and had on about 5 shades of brown, my dads favorite color. Sunday as the critter ran behind the breakfront (or china cabinet) that belonged to my grandmother (oh wait this is my moms mom, the one with the hats is my dads mom) I thought of how this neighborhood group came around with these mouse flyers, well to kill them. I remember when she got the glue traps and I remember her killing a few with the shovel (Lawd she was so old school!!). And then there's my granddad who would let me clean a chitlin (yeah I know but that's what we ate) and then he would re-clean it and throw it in the pot. I didn’t mean to get so sentimental. I just feel so bad for folks who don’t have and/or get along with their families.

Sometimes I really have to question if I am asking to much from my service providers. Most days I really don’t think I am, but I do try to put myself in their shoes. Today after I was ready to write the manager and owner and whoever else would listen a letter about how bad their service was, the service guy who handles writing up my car comes and gets me from the waiting room and has the valet take me to work! I had just missed both shuttles and I already told a few people (the one service tech with bad skin and hair (she needed proactive & Wen LOL) pretty much ignored me) that I wasn’t happy and he tried (and succeeded) to make me less annoyed about the whole situation. I still might write a letter (no really I won’t) but it would be far less angry.

Last week I really wanted to put as my status that I just pooped and felt better about the whole day! But that would have been way to much information. Even right now it’s a helluva overshare!!

I am so lost in music right now. NeoSoul Café is where I go to listen to more mellow stuff. But some days can be really rap heavy. I mean of the neo soul variety, but you know some days I just don't feel like it.. So after I heard Jose James today I hopped on YouTube and been listening to just his stuff pretty much all day. His voice does not match what I thought he would sound like. First off he is this cutie patootie from the Midwest he looks like he might do a freestyle rap but then he opens his mouth and sings with this voice that just doesn’t fit. It’s not a bad thing in fact I would love to see him in concert which is why I gotta open my lounge for artists just like this! I keep telling myself it can’t be that hard. I just need a sponsor or 2! Maybe I can call Ray Ray up and see if he could throw $50k my way!! LOL I love how I think I can call Ray Lewis up on a whim. And his band.. back to Jose James... is freaking amazing! I need to get his cd’s. Most recently I got Elle Varner, Nas, Mary Mary, and DMX all on the same day. I know the cashier was looking at me crazy. But the goal was to get Elle Varner and Nas, but Mary Mary and DMX were like $5.99 so I just grabbed them. What’s funny is I already had the Mary Mary cd. As I listened I kept saying hmmm this sounds sorta familiar. And then sure enough when looked there it was. Now the explanation for DMX, I just like him. Always have! On the radio, versions of the song they are far less gritty. But actually listening to what he is saying is sometimes hilarious! He completely and totally disrespects his wife, I mean that’s not funny but some of the lyrics are. And then when I watch those shows like Rehab with Dr. Drew or that couple show he was on, I mean he went through some stuff! And then there is Nas who again the only explanation is, I LIKE HIM! I can pinpoint the exact time and place where I became a fan. It was the summer I worked as an intern at State Farm. I carpooled with Fatima (Lawd what was her last name) and our compromise was, her music on the days she drove, my music on the days I drove. Well she pumped Nas the entire summer!! I was more of a happy rap (you know like Kid N Play, Heavy D) kinda chick. But that summer Life’s a Bitch and then you die that’s why we puff fly cause you never know when a gonna GO was my mantra!! Mind you I didn’t puff then nor do I now, but the essence of it is life is short so you might as well have fun. I have pretty much every Nas cd to the shock of many. This new cd "Life is good" while good I’m still trying to figure out how much has he really grown up. I mean the N word is dropped without much care and the constant reference to ‘puffing’ is kinda... ok so I KNOW people smoke regularly but that shouldn’t be your whole life and it seems a little stuck to me. But his one lyric he said ‘like he must got naked pictures of God’ had me howling!! He is a true lyricist, he doesn’t just talk about bling and booty which is what we have an abundance of now! Onto Miss Varner! I first heard her on the radio but didn’t even know it was her. That first song ‘I only want to give it to you’ was so infectious I hated to admit I liked it. But every time it was on that was all I sang for the rest of the day. And then I heard the next song on NeoSoul Café ‘So fly’. The lyric that got me ‘ I got a beautiful soul but only 4 people know... they knew me since I was 10 beauty did not matter then!!’ I was hooked. What I didn’t realize it that she was so young (20 something) and she wrote all her songs! So it is staying in constant rotation in the hooptie!


The Wedding of the year was a few weekends ago!! I’m not sure why I thought I wasn’t going to have a good time but I had a freaking blast!! Open Bars bring out the best in me LOL And I managed to not drop kick any family members which is always a good thing. There were not really any single men. Honestly I have given up on trying to meet someone at a wedding. That has not worked for me thus far. All of the bride’s brothers were from the West Coast and kinda had their girlfriend’s there. All of the groom’s (my cousin... well the bride is now officially my cousin!) boys were married; and the ones that weren’t I either went to school with them or maybe I just wasn’t paying attention. I tend to have this fantasy about ‘Some enchanted evening!!’ which ended up not happening so I danced and drank... drank some more... danced a lil and then drank some more!! Sobieski vodka is NOT to be messed with which I knew real well the next day!! The DJ was great! He was of a blued eyed soul nature BUT HE was rocking!! The happy couple had a good time too! I had to let them both know how janky I can be with gifts, but that they would get it before the end of the year and ON THAT NOTE I still need to get a gift for my girlfriend who got married last year. It’s year 1 so it’s paper... not sure what I’ll get them but... My camera was acting shady that weekend (prolly the family $ brand batteries!) so I literally have 7 pictures but I need to download those. Thank God... errr I mean LBJ that folks are more technologically advanced than me and have posted stuff on facebook. They had a picnic the next day which was really nice. I was REAL glad when I actually had an appetite!! One of the brothers made pulled pork and beef OMG it was so good!! I had to take it easy on the beef because I wanted it to stay in my tummy!!

I talk about food a lot. I’m like Jill Scott not a blog goes by where I have not mentioned food! And I really enjoy eating. I mean it is an event sometimes! I recently tried the crab poached egg at Duesenberg's!! ___________________ this is me on the floor cause it was so freaking delicious. It may just be the time of year, but I have not tasted crab so sweet in a long time.

I have buyers remorse for this hair cut... and it’s GONE!! So now I just have to wait patiently for it to grow to the length I had wanted it cut to in the 1st place. Thank LBJ my hair grows somewhat fast!! But was rocking a crazy comb-over and i must not got no friends cause no one tole me how bad I looked LOL Actually i got more chopped off and just today I said I was rocking the Gwen Ifill... not good but I just gotta comb it differently and not as a middle aged white man aka THE COMB OVER!!

i really need another glass of wine and some apple jacks and think my evening will be complete!!

olympic edition

I really need for my doctor to stop prescribing me the crazy pills I clearly keep taking. And here’s why… These Olympics have been really good. What is really driving me bonkers right now is the silver and bronze medal. Everyone who is there is an Olympian. Just to make the team, whatever team, is a feat in and of itself. Most people let alone athletes can’t even say they are or were an Olympian. So why in the heck are we tripping… or I should say the commentators tripping when someone comes in second or third. SERIOUSLY?!?! Last night I watched the little girl on the vault. #2 is not what she wanted, but dammit #2 aint bad!! She fell and she was so GOOD that she STILL came in second. The little Dominican girl fell too, but she didn’t even place. And don’t even get me started on Michael Phelps coming in #2 and #4 that one time. And the dude on the men’s gymnastics team came in third. The USA men’s team did not do all that great, so they were a little more happy about his bronze medal.

I found myself watching fencing for longer than I care to admit and not really knowing what the hell was going on. I did catch on though, so if both players hit at the same time that is considered a ‘double tap’. And the USA was ahead so much that it was ok that the double tapped a few times. I felt bad for the Korean fencer who sat there while they reviewed the tape (I guess) and she was contesting the ruling. Basically if she left the court (or stage maybe?) she would have conceded. So she sat for like an hour and a half waiting. Now here again this was for the gold, but sweetie… SILVER aint bad!!

Onto track a field. Some random dude on FB said he didn’t really want to see the men’s ‘junk’ when they run and that they should have a better uniforms. I like the ‘JUNK’!! And all the muscles. Last night that little boy from Jamaica…WHEW LAWD!! Yohan what they call him! He was the cutiest patootiest!! Now he could stand to get some adult orthodontia but other that that ***THUMBS WAY UP***Even the dude from South Africa with no legs… who I didn’t even realize didn’t have any legs until they focused on them prosthetics, he was a cutie too!! They flashed the dude from USA, all smiles my way!!

I don’t know why, maybe in some parallel universe but I think I can be an Olympian. What sport I have NO GOOD CLUE!! For a while I though maybe softball, but those chicks are serious!! You don’t just walk off the street and start throwing a ball. It would have to be some off the wall event that no other American exceeds like…. HANDBALL!!! I am looking at my app for the Olympics and there is no American team. I have no idea what it is but I’ma start training for it!! Now see I could had said badminton or table tennis, but the Asian got that on LOCK!! Hole up… are those 2 things the same thing?!? Oh my bad the Canadians… wait a second their players have Asian names. OK as pc as I try to be… CLEARLY I am not doing a good job right now, so I’m gonna move on. (LOL). FYI… cause I just googled it, badmiton and table tennis are 2 separate sports!! Now I gotta go google handball… ok it’s kinda like soccer and basketball. Yep I’m starting me a team!! Oh wait, hole up THERE IS A Team USA handball team. I’m gonna go get on it!! Cause I’m sure it’s just that easy!! IJS

my thoughts exactly... humpday edition

i really have no complaints about my job... love life could be better, well I mean it would be nice if it existed LOL and if I can stop kicking or stepping on my cat in the middle of the night life would be grand!

but here is what's baking my noddle. The bathroom!! THAT'S FREAKING RIGHT the bathroom. I posted one day how anyone could get the liner from the dispenser, put it on the toilet, you USE said toilet and then get up without the liner flushing!! That is so gross!! Just doa quick look back. I blame the automatic flushers cause if you had to lift you foot to do the flushing, you would see.. OH YEAH THE LINER... let me make sure that thing gets flushed. The other day everyone's poop schedule was 1:25 that bathroom was STAAANKIN!!! I stood there for a sec to decide if I was going to hit up another floor... but my schedule was the same and when I gotta go I GOTS to go!!

ok ok.. that was a bit much of oversharing!!

I am trying so hard to pretend like my WEN-less hair does not look like a bail of hay on top my head. my co-worker spent a ridiculous amount of money on a keratin treatment, but I really wanted to tell her...all you need is some WEN. By now everyone knows I am an infomercial/QVC/HSN junkie. I try so hard not to watch...no wait, I try so hard not to BUY!! but here lately it be calling my name!! My most recent purchases (not including today because I AM getting ret to get some WEN) but a few nights ago I got a smart phone :) YAY I upgraded... well the phone. Cause it's still a pre-paid phone. A few maxi PETITE dresses cause this chick is tall... but I needed a shorter maxi dress!!

i don't like learning things about people that are negative... actually I'm really ready to whoop some ass. But instead I'll Chill!

I LOVE the Olympics!! when they cry I cry. I am just so (word for the day) INVESTED!! Ummm has anyone noticed Ryan Seacrest's hair?!? It is a person all by itself. It just sits so loftily atop his head perfectly coiffed!! OH and the Proctor and Gamble commercial saluting the moms... I get chocked up just thinking about it. And Gabby... FREAKING Gabrielle Douglas. She is a beast!! OF course she is in the all around but the other little girl in it deserves it too. They ALL work hard, they ALL sacrifice, just cause the other OTHER little girl was the favorite... well and the reigning world champ... didn't make it SHE JUST DIDN'T!! I need for some focus to be on Gabby and that cutie patootie Ryan Lochte!! And did the black dude swimmer from Charlotte (can't remember his name) get a medal??

Target, I know you tried but the commercials for back to school are just not as good as last year. Stop trying to FORCE the song. denim... denim...denim... BACKPACKS!! LOL

LAWD I have been so sleepy... I do not think I will make it ti see Soul Man with Cedric and Niecy tonight :/

hump day random...

I just read this article, ‘The top 10 lessons of career reinvention: what my 5 careers have taught me.’ It caught my eye because I can remember precisely in college a guest speaker coming to speak to one of my marketing groups. She said over the course of your life you will have 10 careers. I thought then, well NOT ME because I am getting a degree in marketing and that’s what I’m going to do. I should have known there was some validity because even at the time the professor over us had went from a BS in accounting and switched to get her PhD in Marketing. Going from numbers person to a more creative person was a big change. So in this article #8 is ‘There is absolutely no security or stability except in who you are inside yourself’ I have always always ALWAYS said there is no such thing as job security, yet I see people continue to work as if they can’t be let go, or that things may change in their lives and they may want to leave. I think we all get a little stuck sometimes. Stuck because you know for a fact this is not where you are supposed to be, but having no clue how to get out. I recently had this experience where I was just stuck. And even as I look back to the not so long ago past I cannot make sense of it. It’s funny to have my friends try and explain it to me about my life and I listen knowing they have no idea for the decision I made, but still allowing them to have an opinion as to why I stayed in position for a long ass year. Now I’m not so stuck. I’m still not completely where I want to be, but a heck of a lot more at peace. Now it’s time to work on some other things in my life.

Switching gears completely… Magic Mike made me so very happy!! I am not one of those chicks who like going to strip clubs. I know women who do and I don’t knock it, it just has never really been my thing. Even in my 20’s I went ALL the way to DC (LOL) with one of my girlfriends to see this group of black strippers. They were… BIG in a lot of ways!! And I had a good time, but that was it. I didn’t need to go to another show (ever) the next week, or travel to Philly to see them again. It was just I had fun that was nice and that’s it. SO when the previews for Magic Mike came out I was surprised at myself for showing such an interest in wanting to see the movie. They showed a bunch of buffed basically naked men. WHY should I not want to see this movie? So one of the concerns was they are all white men. My retort was AND?!?!? So as luck would have it the Saturday (opening weekend mind you) as BGE scurried to restore electric from the previous night storm and the thermometer kept rising and rising going to pay for some ac in the form of a movie was right on time. The theater was packed and I went with 2 of my GGG’s and we weren’t able to sit together, which was fine with me because they both like to talk during the movie and I’m more of a HEY let’s just watch the movie kinda chick!! I sat next to a couple and the man said to the wife ‘I’m going to get some pointers from this movie so I can start a second career!’ She giggled, I busted out laughing. They had to have been in their 50’s with most likely grown kids. Then I had to really stop and get a good look at him. They were a cute couple but I resisted the urge to say ‘buddy keep whatever day job you got!!’ The storyline was truly not that deep. You had a bunch of strippers who welcomed a newbie into the fold and they were preparing to take their ‘show’ to Miami. There was a lot of nudity : ) full frontal, side frontal, and back frontal LOL (that was from Will & Grace when Jack was describing nude scenes that Kevin Bacon had in various movies. It makes NO SENSE but I say it all the time and folks look at me like I’m crazy… which is usual for me). There was some drug use and sales. Mike’s goal was to make handmade furniture and then he had an epiphany… and then the movie was over. I sat there for a minute waiting for something else to happen. I’m not sure what I wanted to happen but the way it ended was whack! HOWEVER, it was still worth it to see that much nekkidness on the big screen!!!

I feel like the Lion in the Wizard of Oz the scene where they stole the guard’s uniforms and his tail keeps making it go up in the back. My skirt is long-ish, but for some reason I keep thinking it is not down all the way in the back. That is a horrible fear that I would walk in front of people and my skirt is tucked into my panties!!!

I have been listening to a lot of jazz lately. I go into and out of phases of what I like most at the time. The radio just doesn’t play many things I like, and if I hear that whining ass song from Usher one mo time I am gonna scream!! I even heard a house remix and I was like NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I just feel that the lyrics should grow with you. Having sex, going to the club, drinking, and buying bling should not be the main theme of your songs. AND IF IT IS... be mature about it. I mean REALLY Mary, are you still talking about bad boys?!?!? Aren’t you married? SWV just came out with a new CD and for most of the faster paced songs I was just like UGH… no as a matter of fact I do not want to ‘co-sign’ for your love. Da hell does that even mean?!? In current rotation in my car/iPod: Esperanza Spaulding (she is the phenom who plays everything, but mainly the bass and won the grammy for best new artist the year Justin Beiber was nominated (tweens don’t like her LOL)), Gregory Porter (his voice sounds like a big bear hug. The first time I heard him I pretty much stopped what I was doing to goggle and find out who this dude was!), Robert Glasper (He has kind of been around for a while as a pianist. His new compilation cd has everyone from Lalah Hathaway to Bilal to Erykah Badu) and The Mitchell & Newbury Band (totally found this on a whim. It’s a compilation CD from 2007 with Fertile Ground on it, probably the last song they did together. But the rest of the CD has this kinda jazzy samba Latin feel to it from 2 white guys from Europe LOL). I actually throw in a little Mary Mary, Jill Scott and Ledisi for good measure.

I cut the top of my foot about 2 months ago. It was healing pretty well now it’s just a little black mark on my right foot instead of the hug gash it was. So last week why did one of those sonofabitch mosquitoes bite me right on the sore?!? It was puffy and painful and now I am back to wearing open in the center shoes, but of course no today!! I need some new shoes. Because the ones I have on today are not only old, but they really hurt. I need to keep a pair of flip flops in my desk. These were already in the ‘goodwill’ pile and they are going to go right back in it!!

So when I get an invite to have cupcakes for someone’s birthday on my team it doesn’t matter if I know the person LOL I just go! My co-worker who is a lot less adventurous than me said ‘aren’t you embarrassed?’ I said NOPE I’ll meet the birthday girl when I get there! I used to get so embarrassed about so many things as a kid and teenage… young adult. Now I’m like hell no! I didn’t do anything to get embarrassed. This is what embarrassed means: ashamed of something and worried about what other people will think of you. I could give about 2 craps an a ½ what people think of me!! The cupcake was so/so (the lady who made them sat right across from me so of course everyone was like THESE ARE DELICIOUS). But the dog stories were the BEST!! They just kept going on... and on... and on... LMBAO

random 498762252.1

I got so much trobule on my mind. I REFUSE TO LOSE!! - Public Enemy

Actually I don't have trouble I have RANDOMNESS!! so here goes:

-my co-worker said she was stressed because our manager asked her to move some things in an email account to a folder in a shared drive. I told her YOU DON'T KNOW STRESS!! This aint stress this is cake, and I will have another slice thank you!!

-the mosquitoes bit me on my FACE!! them sob's danced around everywhere I sprayed and get their blood from my face

-YES as a matter of fact I DO want to see Magic Mike. Channing Tantum!!! Matthew McConaughey!!! And that other (well several other)cutie patottie!! YES PLEASE!!!

-my doctor...well my hematologist (my primary care just wants to be sure I am close to healthy as possible because right now she says I am healthy-ISH) asks me what I like to do. So after I stop looking like a deer in the headlights I said 'well I know saying watching TV and drinking wine are probably not so good, but that's what I like to do... AND GARDEN!! because that sounds good, right?' He was dying laughing!!

-the nurse at this place took my blood and then apologized for sticking me... ummm, I didn't feel a think you did a GREAT job Nurse Katie!!

Tahj Mowery (you know Tia & Tamera's lil brother) is on a new show on ABC Family. But why does he look Asian and not black?

Why have I been watching ABC Family? I am kinda addicted to 'Bunheads'

Cedric's new show is GREAT!! I love Cedric!!

Why oh why does my neighbor pop out of freaking NOWHERE to say hello?? I really wish I could take him up on his offer to mow the lawn, but I need to know his situation. Is that your wife/girlfriend/sister/cousin?!?! And NO I am not tryna holla (why can't my neighbors look like the dude in Janet Jackson's Anytime video... or any other video she made in the 90's LOL) but I just don't wanna feel indebted. I mowed you lawn so now let's go upstairs(boooom chikka WOW WOW)!!! UUUhhhh nooo (LOL)

Ok it's not really stalking if I have no idea where the cute tall dude sits. But I was driving right behind him and I have his license plate memorized (ok yes that teeters on stalking... but only if I do something with it. It can play around in my brain forever!! LMBAO) Plus it looks like a family car... although he is TALL so a sedan doesn't necessarily mean 'I have 10 kids'.

I at least am working with men but there are really only a few cuties. One guy is still there from when I worked there in my 20's. I had a little crush on him and when I saw him again last week I was like eeeewwww what on earth was I thinking?!?!?

finding stuff out about the old job is both hilarious and confirms I made the right choice to leave.

to my dog friends, i know you love your dog, I KNOW, but can you ease up on talking about how amazing they are?!? I mean they aint got opposable thumbs which is what I tell my cat. My mom says I talk to her like she's a human. I'll say why are you trying to pick that up you aint got opposable thumbs chick!! OH wait did I just go to the dark side of talking about how amazing my pet is?!?!? (I mean she kinda is; anything that can lick their lady parts is pretty freaking amazing!!!)

if english is not your first language I am going to need for you to listen to the WHOLE question before you answer "YES"! Don't use context clues... just listen. And really that goes for native english speakers as well!

I am addicted to QVC, but don't tell anyone!! I just got my 2 petite maxi dresses and they are PERFECT!!! even though I am a tall chick i prefer my dresses not drag on the ground!

the intention was to open a bottle of Gollywobbler tonight and that didn't happen. Oh yeah the intention was also to make a lime simple syrup for the raspberry lemon drop i was going to test.. OH WAIT I have some simple syrup in the frig... hold on...hmmm maybe I don't need simple syrup since the lemonade is pretty sweet... (adjusting recipe in my head)

i am sooo sleepy right now. There is more but this is gonna hafta do for today!!

up to date

Ok so I have to bring you up to date on so many things… I have not been diligent in keeping up with my randomness. So let’s break it up into segments...

ATL
Went there to see my brother’s youngest son, or nephew, graduate from high school. Saw both him and the oldest nephew who has some plans for his future which is good! Graduate nephew is going to college in ATL which is good. I stayed in his room that he cleaned just for me O_o. Moving on… His grandmother made this lasagna that was sooooooo freaking good, that I have decided to stop trying!! Mine always needs ‘something’ and I never can put my finger on what that something is so I am officially DONE! She also bakes but you gotta catch her when she’s in the mode. Back to the nephews… I am so proud of them both!! They are maturing differently from a girl, but the youngest one is going to get there eventually the oldest is getting there (wherever there is) at a faster rate now that he is well into his 20's. The actual graduation was slow and when I watched the Glee season finale I was like ' Dag I wish the graduation I went to was this fast' LOL. ATL is nice to visit but I could never wrap my head around living there.

Dallas
no not the TV show. My family reunion was in Dallas and alls I got to say about that is it was HOOOOT! I don’t do real well in very hot heat. The good thing is that it was dry heat. The actual reunion it was great to see some family that I truly only see every so often. The airport was kinda weird. i walked a good while until I realized the exits were on the side. I had to ask a badged person how the heck do I get out. And that's just what I said. HOW THE HECK DO I GET OUT!!! I requested from my cousin that was hosting to provide me with a single oilman and then maybe I would stay. He did not provide said man (LOL)

Job
I gave notice and left my job. YAY!! I mean this is truly a thank LBJ moment! I would have stuck it out as long as I could but it was getting pretty unbearable. What had happened is… the quick and dirty is an old contact contacted me, I had an interview that was calm and easy and went well and then basically they were waiting for me to give them a start date. The month of May had a lot going on, mainly graduations and vacations. And my vacation which consisted of 2 days tacked onto a holiday which made for a long weekend which up until I actually took it cause great concern in my office. Now everyone else can take weeks at a time but me… not so much. I am breathing such a sigh of relief right now. I didn’t realize how exhausted I was and how stressed I was over such non-relevant things but they were relevant then I guess. The good news was that the light at the end of the tunnel was actually in plain sight; it wasn’t just a future hope! I fully expected to be escorted out. Not because I had done anything wrong, but that is how this company operates. But then I was told that I wasn’t a disgruntled employee (which led me to believe they REALLY didn't know me) so I could stay AND train the new temp that they were going to get (oh joy more like OH HELL; but that part will be in another section of this here blog). So when CR manager said I was leaving them in a lurch it took a whole lot from deep within the pits of my good, kind, selfless (humble LOL) soul to not just get up and leave right that minute (here comes another sigh!!). I guess the lurch part was because I was taking those 2 pesky days of vacation and that damned Memorial Day Holiday. How dare I give notice AND take vacation?? And couldn’t I just extend it 1 more week?? UUUHHHH not just no, but HELL NO!! I have done all the putting up with I’m gonna do up until the very last hour I was there. I should be recommended for sainthood (there goes that humbleness again :) ) My last day I knew it was going to be rough when to treat myself, I go to Chick-Fil-A and them fools did NOT have any hot beverages, which includes coffee. And I needs my coffee EVERYDAY!! Thank LBJ yet again that now my Caribou is right up the street. So NEW job which is what I used to do a few years ago, but this economy has hit everyone kinda hard so all the jobs I used to have dried right up. It’s good because I am getting my skills back up. Not that dealing with the industry didn’t keep me sharp, but dealing with the people sometimes dumbing stuff down I had to look at them like REALLY?!?!? Self improvement is important to me so it just bothers me when folks get stuck on stupid. Tweedle too was actually going back to school. She was not a tweedle cause she was dumb, she just had very comical ways (like buying a harness for her bunny!). THE Tweedle didn’t want to learn anything new, didn’t want to take a note, refused to accept that we are in the technology age and that email is necessary. She was very frustrating. So the text she sent after I left I ignored because I am not, nor have I ever been a hoarder of information. Whatever I know, you can know cause I’ma tell you! I’ll even show you my shortcuts that helped me along the way. But when your response to me is ‘Yeah ok, whatever…’ then I shut down. And I am so done. Bridges are not burned but I so do not want to cross back over any time soon (or ever). Is now a good time to talk about the temp?!?! Yeah sure why not. It was my thought for a good 2 minutes that I would help out choosing the person the temp agency would send because I know my job, and who better to decide who should replace me, than me. Well it didn’t really work out that way cause what do I know?!? So the temp was sent in and after a few hours of showing and explaining stuff to her I felt like I was wasting my time. She most definitely had the skill set, but the personality, not so much. I have a filter (or at least I hope I do) that tells me what to say and what not to say especially to people I just meet and ESPECIALLY in a work setting. I think the first day I knew she was going through a divorce, dating a dude from Miami who foots the bill for a lot of her expenses, she lived with here sister who has 7 kids, she has 2 kids (later found out it was at home with her parents), she worked at MAC and Hopkins and Victoria Secrets, she is a dominatrix who sells alcohol infused candy on the internet and through all this she did NOT find time to tighten up her weave. She had 2 phones that went off constantly. Dude you’re a temp, SURELY you can’t be that important that you need 2 phones!! Lastly, and this is where I knew my time was being wasted, her eyes were going sleepy time throughout the whole day. I even made it a point to see if this week when I was being trained how many times my eyes went sleepy time, not at all on the 1st day probably because I was excited and the person who trained me I knew so it was good to catch up with her and all the people still here. My current situation I have 2 managers (which could suck but it so doesn’t) that I have to report to but it is cool in the gang! Both are women and smart and exude confidence of not only what they know but how to get things done (another sigh!!) Also, I have 2 admins and I have been going back and forth to see who has the best supplies! On day #4 my only complaint is that the lady who sits (and she really never SITS but you know whatever) diagonal from me said my music was too loud, but really that’s not even bad because I stick in my ear buds and be jamming and singing and dancing. Me and Pandora been having a great relationship this week. And HandzOn too! Got the good house music going on. the actual work is not bad either. Quick and dirty I'm doing data collection.

Jazz Fest
The Capital Jazz Fest was this weekend and because I am so low tech I couldn't (or didn't) 'check-in' or tweet pics or what have you. But I was serenaded by Afro Blue!! You know the kids from Howard who were on the Sing-Off. They were all smaller that I thought they would be, but they were also a very attractive bunch of people. I say this and I can't really remember who's page I was on but I looked at the people in the pics and said, 'this is NOT a good looking bunch of folks'. Anyways, they had this workshop tent where certain artist came and basically answered questions. So after I got lost, found my soror who works for the Lottery (got some scratch off and won 2 bucks YAY ME!!), got lost some more, FINALLY found the tent and it was me and 3 other people. So when they sang for the first time it really was like they were serenading me. And I loved it!! More peopel came after they heard what they were missing. The only reason why I didn't stop watching the Sing-off after they got voted off, was because there really was talent on the show and even though I disagreed with some of the choices, I am glad the group that won, won (who's name escaped me now. Had to google that... Pentatonix). The line up was not great on Saturday, but I kinda heard Frank McComb as we rushed to get in. And then I heard Afro Blue!! Kenny Lattimore and Maysa. The rest were a blurr.

Hair
I cut it all off!! That's big new in a black women's life. I been rocking the wedding hair, that's what I refer to as long hair, for a while. But honestly the only reason I hadn't cut it is cause I didn't have a reliable hair dresser. So I went back to my girl. And I can't really remember why I stopped going to her. Well yeah I do remember but the reasons were not worth me not going back. She just set up a hair salon and seems to be doing well. Now her prices are ALL over the place, but we are good for right now. And now everyone is getting all this fabulous color and now I want some color.

TV and movies **spoiler alert**
*I don't know who thought killing Lexi off was a good idea.
*What the hell is Curt going to do?!?! He can't stay in Lima.
*thank you SYFY for only playing Lost girl at 10pm. YOU know I can't stay up that late!! So now I need to catch the rest of season 1 and all of season 2. The Ash is in a coma and I have no idea why (plus the sex scenes were AWESOME for basic cable... **clearing throat** I mean you know if you like that sorta thing IJS)
* Thank you TNT (or is it USA) for putting Michael Ealy on a regular show that I can watch every week. That dude is several kinds of sexy and I don't know why I tried to resist (the sex scenes in 'Think like a man' with him... yeah i got a lil hot and bothered but it was pg-13 LAWD what would they have shown in an R movie ***SMDH***)
* The Avengers in 3-D WORTH the cost of admission
* Hunger Games - I thought this mess was a trilogy. I about lost it when Rue got killed. And was it based in the future?!? Do we really need coal miners in the future? And WHY were there only 2 black folks... oh wait I almost forgot Lenny Kravitz another just SEXY man. moving on
*Dark Shadows.... NO just no no no.
*Think Like a Man - cute but the Steve Harvey scenes got to be a little annoying. I am rocking a modified Meagan Goode asymmetrical and also taking her tip to wear sexy panties to attract the men (well ok in the movie she was wearing granny panties so she wouldn't be tempted; but the reverse should work, right?). I have already discussed Micheal Ealy. Romany (can't think of last name, but he was in Weeds and 40 yr old virgin) he is kinda cute! They had a few top off scenes with him. Yep!!
Need to see Thor, cause the dude playing is a cutie patootie AND Idris Elba is in the movie, and Captain America so I can be caught up on my Avengers


...and that's about it!!

thursday drivel

so I’m driving down 695 yesterday and for some reason Michael Baisden is playing something WHACK! I mean I like old school just as much as the next late 30’s person, but if he play ‘Square biz’ by Teena Marie one mo gin I am gonna scream! So then I start my radio shuffle and start with 1 which is 92Q (yeah I give people grief about listening to this station but every once in a while they play some non rap) So on the station they are playing go-go and to be more specific Chuck Brown. And I’m like hole UP… do I have the right station, so I look down and yes. Hmmm WHY are they playing go-go on 92Q?!?!? What the heck is going on. and then the announcer comes on ‘R I P Chuck Brown!’ And I’m like wait WHAT?!? And then I hit 2 which is 95.5 they are playing Chuck Brown, I hit 5 which is 93.9 THEY are playing Chuck Brown. Then I go back to 3 which is Majic 95.9 and Michael B is talking about Chuck Brown. AWWW HELL and that’s when the water works started. And it’s not so much that I was a huge Chuck fan and I used to always joke that he was 150 yrs old, but it’s like EVERYONE is just dying and I can’t handle it. I can tell you where I was for everyone this year... Whitney: I was folding clothes and got a text from my sister and call from my girlfriend who was DISTRAUGHT. Heavy D: I had just got off 695 and was going to another girlfriends house to make sure her trash can was in her yard and then my sister called and the water works started because my dad liked Heavy D (it was a random thought but he really did and since he’s gone that made me start thinking of him). Now Dick Clark I saw something on FB about Chubby Checker (and his afro wig or weave LAWD I don’t know what is on top of that man’s head) and then my little baby cousin said YOU DIDN’T HEAR!?!? And nope I hadn’t. And those are just the celebrities. My girlfriend’s mother just passed away a few weeks ago and she was devastated. And as much as you say to someone it is not their fault and they did a good job as a care taker, people think what they are going to think and it is a process of mourning and grieving when you lose someone close to you. I have had several vendors who have had to stop work because of funerals. It just seems like here lately not a day has gone by where someone has not been affected by a recent death.

I don’t know why this is a recent epiphany or as Oprah would say, an AH HA moment, but I really do not like when people think I don’t know what I’m doing. I had someone ask me if I knew the difference between a month and a quarter and I think if that prick was anywhere close to me I would have beat him within an inch of his life. NO SERIOUSLY did you just fucking ask me that?!? So you think I don’t know the difference between 1 month which is 30 days and a quarter which is 3 months and about 90 days??? I am still a little hot about that whole situation ESPECIALLY since I didn’t do anything wrong and the information provided was correct both in MONTH and QUARTER form. I hate being in proof mode where I have to prove it to you. AND WHO ARE YOU!? I know this is an insecurity I have to get over and not be so emotional about. But some days it just be like that. AND ANOTHER THING I do not have the gift of sight. I can’t read your mind I JUST CAINT!! So stop saying things like ‘if I forget something you have to remind me’ because that doesn’t work for me. If you forget something then you are SOL cause you sure as hell didn’t bother to tell me so how am I supposed to remember?!?!

I sit in an office in the back of my office and even though I know the mailman is an older gentleman, when he comes in and starts talking I always want to get up and see who it is. And then when I do it’s like ooooohhh.. : / He’s a nice guy, but he has kids my age so I need to tell him to have his son stop by LOL.
I just got an impromptu rendition of ‘don’t nobody bring me no bad news’ which was kind of rough so I won’t mention no names to protect the innocent. But I am right now in that mode Don’t nobody better bring me no bad news!! I mean it!! I can only handle good news right now. So if it’s bad… tell me tomorrow.
I have come to the realization ALL cats think they are invisible. For some reason there are a gang of cats that strut about my community like they are paying mortgage. And honestly if they are taking care of the critters before they enter my house it’s all good in the downtown hood! But last night I opened up my back door and this very orange Garfield looking tabby stops in her place an looks at me as if to say ‘you can’t see me so stop looking at me bitch!!’ But I had to bust her out I said OH yes I can see you YOU’RE ORANGE!! The grass is green, you don’t blend sweetie!

Ok the new pest control guy is kinda cute MARRIED but still kinda cute, which is good seeing as how we did not get the cute UPS driver today. I always check the ring finger like so if he wasn’t married were we going out a date tonight?!?! Well I’d like to think I have enough mack diva skills to pull that off, but I don’t know LOL

NO NOT DONNA SUMMERS!!! Oh LAWD… I caint take no mo!!

I have totally gotten my money’s worth...

I have totally gotten my money’s worth from my pre-paid phone this month!! I have 9 minutes left and I then I need to recharge. What’s funny is I called a friend on Sunday and I said I have 23 minutes so what’s going on?!?! Don’t you know that fool yawned and flipped channels and had sooooooooo many pauses throughout our so-called conversation and then finally I said OK so I’ll talk to you later. I was like did she hear me say I only had 23 minutes?!?! So now I am down to 9. 1 was wasted on facebook trying to get it in my office that has a temperamental Wi-Fi. But hey it’s ok I do need to make some calls but like Kevin Hart, the way my bank account is set up it has a checking and a savings and I have to transfer some funds. LOL I finally got the dvd Laugh at my Pain (this is me digressing) and it was funny. Not as funny as some of his other stuff. I didn’t realize he was getting a divorce. not that it matters but I be rooting for both black love AND Hollywood love... well LOVE and marriage in general. Folks be married for a while and then they blow up and just go crazy. I don’t know if that is the case with Kevin Hart, but George Lopez dropped his wife of forever years, Dion Sander, Ne NE (LOL). I keep waiting to hear Chris Rock is getting a divorce. I mean I really hope not but it’s inevitable right?


I would like to thank LBJ for the spray bottle of Clorox that is strategically placed in the bathroom by ME because a little sanitation never hurt nobody! I don't know what that was on the toilet, but whatever it was was KILLED by the bleach.


I have NO appetite so why Lord WHY did I just burn my little bagel?!? It looked so good! I know I can't come on the computer and cook at the same time. Many a dish has been burnt or almost burnt because I was tryna do both. You know I slapped some butter on it and am still gonna eat it. It's just a little extra crunchy LOL Meanwhile my cat's appetite has increased. Her little rations for the day (she gets 2 from her auto feeder) be GONE in a hour and she used to just nibble throughout the day. Right now she is looking at me like bitch you KNOW I'm still hongry!! And I will probably throw some extra food in her bowl cause that's the kinda cat mommy I am!

it is so weird what I find sexy these days!! **SMDH**

WHY do I keep seeing random cats in my backyard!?!? One little orange tabby was sitting in my flower bed like she owned it. And there was one little black and white one (technicolored LOL) who just crossed through. ALTHOUGH, if they can keep the critters at bay outside than that is less for Paisley to find inside.

I'm so sleepy and I need a new bed AND to hit the lottery not necessarily in that order...


Okay I am not feeling the spacing on this new version of blogger. OH I figured it out :) Now I can't find spell check oh well.. that's never stopped me before. Oh yeah I made it to 2 minutes on the phone!!

stress and other random things...

I am a bit stressed out. Between job, family, and money concerns I am hangin in there but some days just barely. I mean it’s true, I try to stay positive but some days just wear me down with the amount of negativity that I have to endure on a daily basis. The Four Agreements - Be impeccable with your word; Don’t take anything personal; Don’t make assumptions; Always do your best - is something I have posted on my wall and I look at often. Because when I get reprimanded for something I didn’t do I have to remind myself to NOT take it personal. Or when it’s 4:30 and have a list a mile long list of things to do but I told a vendor that I would have it to them by 5, I have to do it because I said I would. But here lately my best is more like ‘meehh… I’ll get to it when I get to it’. My attitude SUCKS!!. I know it’s time to bounce when I start feeling like this. I am mad I didn’t play the mega millions because I was feeling pretty lucky and that idiot from Mickey D’s who said she hid the ticket at work, I’m sure all the people involved with that little shenanigan have thoroughly beat her ass, cause she needed it!! And family… well you can’t pick your family. We just have to make some decisions sooner than later and I just don’t feel ready. As for money that goes hand in hand with the job. I have not felt inspired for a while; just going through the motions of doing work because I gotta eat and I gotta live somewhere. Although the thought has crossed my mind to hitch hike across America or go sell fruit and juice on a beach like how Whitney wanted to do and probably SHOULD have done. Island of choice is Bahamas, Freeport area mainly because Bahamian men are sexy as hell and most don't even realize it. Think RICK FOX, cause you know he's from the Bahamas. And then there's Lenny Kravitz because at one point he had a house in the Bahamas. I know this because I read Essence AND he has a ring in a particularly happy place for women! LAWD I have digressed!!

Emergency rooms and real life doctors and nurses DO NOT look like the men and women on ER, Grey's Anatomy, Private Practice and every other doctor show on the teevee. They just look hella regular. During a recent visit to the local ER it was noticed that Dr. Hernandez (or was it Fernandez) had a little bit of cutie patootie going on. But Nurse John, not so much! And then there was Katrina who's dad just named her sister by a different mother who also had a brother by that same mother even though he was younger and the other sister by the mother Katrina has as the legal guardian. Yeah that one made my eyes cross like da hell are you talkinabout?!? Her great claim to fame was metallic fingernails, cause you know I asked, and as she put it ‘what else I'm gon spend my money on?’ Uhh a 401k? A house (oh cause I know ya ass is renting)? Better make-up (cause she had a little unevenness, but nothing a lil MAC or Mary Kay can’t fix)? So yes MANY things you can spend with your money other than metallic GREEN nails with the tiger metallic ring fingers. LAWD I didn't realize how tacky that was until I just wrote it own!! LMBAO. For some reason clogs always throw me off. Like I get that they are comfortable, but my nurse this morning, had on shiny black clogs. Why oh WHY do I notice these things? My midwife who I LOVE had on sensible tan clogs. Even though she looks more like the fraggle Mokie, she is sooo...nice is not the word, she puts me at ease for whatever I need to talk to her about. Doctors don't have that same bedside manner, just like my primary care doctor was trying to rule out me having water build up in my legs and she said is it water? or do you just have fat lil legs? (I should have been offended but she is so direct, the warm and fuzzies evade her). And I need to be at ease when being poked and prodded in my delicate lady parts area. I want a tee-shirt that says I *heart* my midwife. YES I am a cornball!

On the subject of what SHOULD offend me. Freakin Tosh.O on comedy central. This show is so ridiculous. In fact... I had to google something he had on last night which was gross and is unmentionable. BUT the funniest one which is why I started watching the show was this woman in Baltimore, of all places getting on stae to dance. She falls, loses a shoe but does NOT stop. It was hilarious!! It was called Dutty Wine gone wrong. It's taking forever to come up, but his video breakdown most definitely should have offended me. Know what else didn't offend me? Mary sangin about chicken!! And she got paid 2 million.. she aint offended either. OH I found it!! I know there were some other things but that about does it for now.

Onto my current obsessions. Well not really an OBSESSION, more like a fixation or something. So anyways Sid the science kid comes on right about the time I need to be getting my bootay out of the bed. But some mornings I just caint! So I flip between Sid and Andrew Womack (the televangelist whose voice sometimes gets on my nerves, but most times he is usually saying something I need to hear). And I have done extensive research. SOOOoooo here's what I know. Sid is a bi-racial kid who wants to know everything about everything. His mom is black (or as some random blog said African american-ish) and his dad is white. These are supposed to be nondescript cartoon characters but I KNOW!! His friends are Mai the only NAMED race kid on the show, and she's Chinese and wears transition lens glasses and a skirt. Gabriela is Latina I know this because her mom was on the show and she had a Hispanic accent and they had a last name like Lopez, or Fernandez (although that's not a tell tell sign... Zimmerman anyone?!?!) Jerrold is pink and has a voice like a 55 year old who smoked 10 packs a day. He is the rocking roller safe bet he's white. Teacher Susie... black. One day at work i was just fixated on this show. I'm not saying this is a bad thing each race and culture has their own thing and this show has the kids learning a lot and it's all fun and games. What I should be ashamed to say is that I know 2 of the songs the sing. When Sid get'sdropped off he sings 'I'm looking for my friends! I'm looking for YOU... and then each kid does a little dance. May has no rhythm, it's funny to see the cartoon dance bad! (you do know I am on pbs.org watching it LOL) and then when it's time to go in. Teacher Susie sings the rug time song... It's soo sad that I know this!!

I keep getting distracted. I started the blog at work and now I'm home still fully clothed and I keep going to random site and random people's pages. Truth is I am sleepy as hell. So i'ma post this. Eat my chicken. Eat my new favorite cheat food peanut butter cheerios OH incidentally I lost 2 pounds of the extra 15 i didn't realize I packed on... so you know that's good!!

the help and other monday randomness...

I read the book and then I went to go see The Help, actually it was a book club book. And I thought it was a good book and the movie, as with any movie based off a book, some things were missed but all in all it was a pretty good movie (no movie could be as bad as Eat, Pray, Love and I had such high hopes for Julia Roberts). I think Viola should have won the Oscar because how many more does Meryl Streep need? Well actually she should have won the Oscar for the supporting role a few years ago for Doubt, which also starred Meryl. That was the role Oprah wanted to get but the director smartly gave it to Viola Davis. So anyways this weekend I watched it again with my mother and sister. Now we are a big bunch of cry babies. We all cry at pretty much the drop of a hat. We were trying to figure out where my mom would shed her first tear. And actually she kept it together right up until the end. Because she lived through that era of having to ‘know her place’ seeing actors portray it did not really affect her in the same way. For me it feels like a travesty, like HOW DARE they speak that way her, or DO THAT to her!!! All the while claiming to be a good Christian. And I see it through a post civil rights era eyes. Not post racist society even though we got Barrack in office mind you, but in my lifetime I didn’t have to sit at the back of the bus, or blatantly did not get a job because of the color of my skin, or have to fight to vote. Don’t get me wrong racism is absolutely still alive and well, but it’s more undercover, well at least sometimes. After I really thought about it, my grandmother who was basically a single mother was just as stuck as these women in this movie. She had 2 little girls and could have just as easily stayed in Mississippi and remained a domestic but she had dreams, goals and plans for her kids. Like many during that time they had to leave the south or chose to leave the south for a better opportunity. She ended up still cleaning for a living but she made a hell of a lot more money and got a pension, sent both her daughters to college and a few of her sister’s sons to college so it all really did work out for the better! It was never an option for any of us to not go to college. In fact when I was messing around with my college applications my mother’s favorite threat was that she was going to go to Pitt and enroll me there or go fill at an application at Giant Eagle (the local supermarket). All of the grandkids went to college and even the one who didn’t still went to a trade school so he still has a good job making plenty of money! We may not be all living up to our full potential (me probably the most and honestly I’m just in a little holding pattern right now, I’ll get it together) but not having a degree has never been an excuse. I work with a few vendors who even today in 2012 say they were never a good reader or speller and I always want to ask them, what did your parents plan for you? Or what did YOU plan for you? Why in the heck can’t you spell good when we have a free school system in the USA? How come you didn’t even finish high school? Or ok so you didn’t but you can go get a GED!? and it’s still FREE. My grandmother’s initial plan was to go to Detroit. We have a lot family that ended up in Chicago, but no one seemed to make it Detroit. We are glad she made a pit stop (ha I made a funny!!) in Pittsburgh AND we are glad she went back to go get her kids because a lot of folks went up north and never came back for their kids. The part in the book and movie where the maid Yule May asked for $75 still makes me wonder why she thought it was ok to ask her employer for the money. But the kicker is that all the good white folks were putting on a benefit to help starving kids in Africa when the black folks right in their own city needed food and help and better wages. It was almost as if Hilly didn’t even believe her maids kids were smart enough or good enough to go to college so why even bother helping them? It was foolish for Yule May not necessarily to steal the ring (cause they probably didn’t even realize the ring was gone) but to try to pawn it in the same city. I don’t condone theft, but I may have had to go to New Orleans or some other big city to pawn it. 75 bucks might as well have been a million dollars

so clearly me having a proper lunch today is not happening. It amazes me that I do not put forth much effort but stuff still gets done. But let me go to the kitchen and heat up my sad little lean cuisine and everybody has a damn question about something they coulda waited 10 more minutes. I am reading an important article in the Citypaper about amateur porn so ok maybe I do need to go back to work because who needs to be reading about regular people making $90k in a year!?!? ME That’s who!! I need to flash a boob and get paid for it!! Although even though my mother doesn’t even own a computer I am still scared she might find out! She told me I couldn’t be a prostitute, but I need to ask her stance on boob flashin!

More days than I care to admit, I need to crawl up under my desk a take a lil nap. And today would be one of those days!! I went to sleep early and slept through the night, but I’m just tired today. I’m already anticipating the weekend!

It used to be the main tweedle (thought she was smart but really kinda wasn’t), lesser tweedle (dumb and she knew it; she gave 8 weeks notice resignation at a company where when you give notice they pretty much escort you out) and then the temp who they (it’s THEY because when I was asked to give my opinion about hiring her I was basically supposed to agree to what redneck manager (because she literally has red on her neck in the form of a neck tattoo and she likes hockey, nascar and rides a motor cycle soo uuhhh I’m not being racist) had already decided; but now 8 months later it’s OOOOH yeah maybe that wasn’t a good decision to hire her… mmm hmmmm) made permanent became new tweedle. And since now both the main and the lesser are gone new tweedle became just THE tweedle. The new co-worked who replaced the main tweedle, started out as new girl who I was going to transition her to be tat girl(who has all the dr. suess tats on her : / yeah she is special) but no she has proven herself to be a tweedle and she is now officially a tweedle too!! It’s hard keeping up with my thought processes but it makes sense trust me!!

I am freaking STARVING!! That lil lean cuisine is gone! Thank God I took out some chicken this morning. I might bake a few wings and foreman a few. I’m now eating some dry ass popcorn, one of those single serve and that gonna have to tide me over because I am trying to avoid the mc-doubles. Whatever happened to natural? I was all for less butter or whatever, but I do not like all the lo-cal popcorn which is exactly what I’m eating; 100 calorie Pop. Give me ALL the cals and some flavor along with it. Better yet I need to get some whole kernels and pop it my damn self!!