irregardless IS NOT A WORD and I'ma need for you to stop saying that before I strangle you!!
little girls always try to punk their dads but this little girl tonight at marshalls said to her dad "I am going to choose a gift and you can get it for my birthday. BUT if it's cheap you can just get it now" I mean it didn't work but that shit was HELLARIOUS!!!
my road rage is going to catch up to me one day. BIG ass trucks and their big ass drivers YOU DON'T SCARE ME!!! But if I stick out my tongue at you BEWARE... I might be following you like george costanza did the driver with the dude with the broken/casted up middle finger
so the nasty lady at panera bread pushes the designated lemon tongs to the side and reaches her fat hand into the lemon container. squeezes lemon. REACHES HER FAT NASTY HAND BACK IN to get lemon #2 THEN... OH IT GETS WORSE... shakes her now lemony hands into the lemon container where all the 'fresh' lemons are!! I was standing there GLAD I got the Mt Dew and looking at her like YOU HAVE GOT TO BE FREAKING KIDDING ME!!!
to the UPS driver that was kinda sweaty the other day...you were still cute as hell sweat and all. And YES i will be poking my head out of my office to say 'how YOU doin" ERR chance I get!! ***big cheesy grin**
when my cat is in the corner licking her lady parts I say 'HEY ARE YOU LICKING THAT BOOTY???' She really does NOT appreciate that in fact she rolls her eyes and usually storms off in a huff. HEY alls I'm saying if I could lick my booty I would want folks to cheer me on!!
popcorn and wine really are a good pair for a meal
it is 2011 the muscle shirt has run it's course and if you are BOLD enough to walk your corny, out of shape ass in front of me, OH YEAH I'ma say something. And it's gonna be loud ESPECIALLY if I had some wine/vodka/rum. OH AND I know your ass is corny cause cause at the event where all the raven's were supposedly 'ballin' your cheap ass gave me a dollar... I needed for you to make it rain!! LMBAO
it's a divided highway. you are not shunned to the left for all eternity!!! That's what I want to yell at ALLLLLL the drivers on 695 who have made my morning commute 5 minutes longer. but for real I'm not complaining cause the whole commute is only 20 minutes!!
to the dunkin donut dude this morning, 1 ketchup IS NOT enough. I know you are the owner/cashier but if you don't give me more for my delicious (have you tried the hash brown there THEY ARE YUMMY!!!) hash browns I AM GONNA GET OUT THE CAR and it's GON GET UGLY!! #doNOTdenyme
to the moms at the chick fil-a... its only 3 of you and 3 kids... you do NOT need 4 tables. So stop looking at me sideways when I sit at the onliest table you haven't dirtied up. OOOHHH and do the lice check AT HOME!! I do not need to know that 5 kids from billy's daycare had lice and it just occured to you to check his head. not cute OR sanitary at all.
I KNOW IT'S HOT... but calling me every 10 minutes is not going to get the HVAC contractor to your site any faster #chillout before a sista gets nasty
actually I didn't ask you to assess the mood of the current caller. if they called for me, I can handle it!! Trust me this aint my first time to the rodeo and when I finish with this fool on the phone he will be writing a letter of praise about me! I GOT THIS!!!
if your bill is $49.13 and you give me a fifty... THAT IS A BAD TIP AND you should NEVER go out to eat EVER EVER EVER again!!!
dude you ordered a cosmo, it COMES in a martini glass, stop trying act like your manly self can't drink a girly drink. that's what YOU ordered... I'm just saying
I lost all my cool points last week when I DID walk into a glass door. (a few weeks prior I stopped short of walking into the door cause I thought it was automatic) The dude on a date tried not to laugh and the chick was like what happened but, I STARTED LAUGHING cause it was hella funny!! I am in rebuilding mode now. I plan to be at a 1000 by year end.
don't show me your new sandals if you didn't bother to take your crusty feet to the nail salon to get a pedi. I threw up a little when you made me look... feet maintenance is essential
thank you for saying I did a good job... CAUSE I DID!! LOL #notmodest :)
i really don't get the # thing, but I know it's a twtitter thing and I think it makes me look cool. HEY it might help me to #rebuildmycoolpoints.com LOL
which brings me to the Braxtons and that mess of a show they have on air... to be honest I've only seen 1 whole show and only parts of others, but tamar and her husband look SOOOOO mismatched. isITlove.com OR isHEpaid.net?!?!? toni... umm your kids look like your ex, and he wasn't the cute one from Mint Condition. The 3 sisters that did the CD I actually have it and it wasn't bad at all!!! the sister that got preggers when the deal was signed.. either tell toni you WANT to sing back-up, or just let it go. Stop crying the blues about the past!!
I was done 1/2 hour ago but then thought of more stuff... BLACK PEOPLE... please Please PLEASE stop using your tee-shirt/sweatshirt, medallions, side of your car back window of you car as a memorial for someone who either was killed or died of natural causes. It's just soooo not a good look!! I have lost family for all types of reasons, but funeralizing them on a shirt is not the way to go.
ok soo... most of this is stuff I just be thinking as my day goes on. Some are too mean for FB status updates. Other stuff I'm just like WOW did you/I just say/do that?!?!? And then most times I'm just too tired of being online to post stuff or write a new blog. Even right now the girls are free and I am about to go to bed. The restaurant stuff is never ending. ACTUALLY the 9-5 stuff is too... that would be some of my 50eleven jobs. that's it, FOR NOW!!
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