I need to try to NOT notice things!!

Sometimes it just gets to be to much and I am overloaded with rants.  Last night I thought the vino smoothed things over BUT NO!!!  Here goes:

• If there is a DO NOT ENTER sign that means everyone.  NOT everyone BUT you!! So ma'am the little traffic jam you done caused at the post office could have been avoided if you just did not enter where you shouldn't have.
• It really is ok to wear the size you are supposed to wear.  Now you may be in denial but your size 20 butt really should not be rocking size 12 jeans
• If my appointment is at 5 then at 5:20 I don't expect for the nurse to just be taking the blood pressure and then you mosey on in at 6:10!!  My time is just as valuable as yours DOCTOR and the appointment has been on the books for months, I didn't just call the morning of and ask for you to squeeze me in.  NO MA'AM!!
• I need to be clued in on when the apocalypse is going to happen because I swear for GAWD it seems like when I only got 3 or 4 items folks have food to wait out whatever storm is acoming
• I really don't like self checkout.  But if I have to because only 2 lines are open and folks got cart FULL of food then make sure it has register tape.
• They (and they know who they are) only open a new line once ALL MY SHIT is on the belt!!! It never fails!!  I want it to fail!  I would like to be the chick getting out of line to be taken care of immediately, but that's not my story, that's not my song!!
• I am always a little slow, and I'm okay with that.  I think I was adult before I realized Madonna was talking about teen pregnancy in 'Papa don't preach'.  My mom heard me singing my heart out one day and wanted me to explain what the song meant, WELL I told her that her Papa was  preacher and she just wanted for him to leave her alone because she's in trouble.  I had no idea what 'trouble' was... ALL this is to say I really want to maintain my naiveté when it comes to Usher's new song.  Can it just be about kissing?!  Can I just believe that is all he's talking about even though he SOOOOOOOO isn't?!?
• Can the people across the street either stop buying cars or allowing people to live there??  I still can't figure out what really going on over there, but just don't park in front of my house EVERYDAY!!
• I thought the people walking up and down the street (same people) were kids.  Everyday without fail there is a group of loud ass people who walk up and then back down about a half hour later.  I opened the door one morning and caught sight of these fools... OLD FOOLS!!!  To old to be that loud so early in the morning disturbing my good sleep!!

That was last Wednesday!  Today I carried my happy ass to the IHOP in Randallstown.  WHY must it be such and adventure when I go out?  Why can't I just read my little book and NOT notice things?!?!?

• I don't know why you think OR who told you blue hair looked good, but sis it really doesn't.  NOR does the funky attitude you seem to have!!  NOR does the flower short short that cover your very big dimply ass!! Listen to people when they talk to you.  Wear your correct size... well wait that doesn't apply here it was her size (not sure wear she got them but hey)... Wear things the compliment your size
• So your barely 1 month old throws right on up on the already nasty carpet, but you and your other small child pose for a selfie?!?! Are you going to clean it up?!?
• It was clearly baby day at the IHOP.. no one told me.
• What you will do is LEAVE when you are done.  you are holding up 2 tables and the dos 2 year olds you brought with you are running everywhere and that is not cute.  I always cringe when kids do this because it is so dangerous in a restaurant.  Anything can drop on them or someone can knock them down and then you gonna be the first in line to sue someone
• the host was rocking a really nice body.  Thank you sir for spending many  hours in the gym (or jail)!!  I could not figure out his deal, but just like Shaun T,  I enjoy looking even when it aint for me!!

chickiness...

I should have posts everyday cause i have random thoughts everyday. Actually more than one.

This is my nativity scene. I jacked it from my jobs Christmas in July. The reason, it's Little Baby Jesus wrapped in swaddling clothes man!! Something about a baby that just brings about hope. And who better than Jesus. And I need hope right now. That and then some.

I am sitting here now ready to go. IT'S FRIDAY!!! One of my supervisors brought in some lunch so late in the day that smells awesome. And I had spaghetti but a Chick is hungry again and I forgot my snacks at home and I got a buck and some random change in my wallet so a snack purchase is out of the question. I could go down and get some free popcorn and some soda, but I kinda want a meal right about now. Yep i gotta go get some of that popping corn...

Why a blog?!?

Well I'm glad you asked! I've been toying with the idea of a blog for some time now. It seems like everyone has one and uses it for some reason or another. Last year when I worked for the liquor company where I had to find all the liquors from around the world to update their sales database, I stumbled onto so many blogs, mostly about wine, or scotch, or rum, or whatever the person or people were most passionate about. One in particular was Where's My Damn Answer. It was so hilarious. I think it's 3 or 4 women who talk pretty much about parenting, wine and tequila. Then there was one on rum, RUMDOOD. Wait maybe that wasn't a blog... I don't remember. And then most recently my exciting job as an HR assistant where they only really need me when they are laying people off, I 'have found' The Black Snob which is like a political kinda thing where the bloggist (umm is that even a word) also has a thing for Michelle Obama and how she dresses. Oh and she had this whole online stalker thing for TJ Holmes. I mean I don't see it but hey... her blog, her thing. She's a pretty noted blogger (oh maybe that's the correct conjugation) showing up in the Washington Post and other sites where people make mention of her. I wish I could remember her name, but I do know she's a Zeta.

And how could I forget 3 Black Chicks!! Probably the main blog that started me thinking waaaay back in early 2000's that I might even want to do this. This site has changed over the years, but it used to be, well 3 black chicks take on movies, both major and independent. And, not always just black movies. I used to read the reviews to see if it was a movie I wanted to see, or if I had already seen the movie I would read it just to see what they said about it. Sometimes they were dead on and some times I would be like did we see the same movie?!?!? Oh and when I worked at the wonderful place I used to work that monitored E V E R Y site, ad click, you name it, my manager in one of many huddle room sessions (think principal's office for adults) asked, well what IS 3 Black Chicks since you go there so much! Yeah I think I was getting written up for being on the internet to much. Oh the joy of modern slavery!!

So here it is, my blog. Maybe it will garner so much attention that I too will have a movie made about it. Julie and Julia was a very cute movie. And I have been thinking about just who would play me. It would have to be a beautiful curvaceous dark skinned beauty (I said beauty twice... eeehhh who am I kidding I'm random AND cute LOL) and not to many people fit that bill. I have a pretty familiar face, but I don't really think I look like anyone in Hollywood. There really aren't many black actresses that are dark. I mean I'm the color of milk chocolate, nice creamy and rich. But many of the actresses are of a lighter hue. I mean Jada, and Sanaa, even Gabrielle are great. There I go on a tangent... a RANDOM TANGENT!!

**disclaimer** As PC as I try to be in the real world I am not going to be here. I'm black, I'm a chick, I like wine and vodka, I like men, I say thank you little Baby Jesus (probably too much) not as a joke but because I really am praising His name, I am well traveled, sometimes well read, I have a potty mouth mostly in the car behind slow ass drivers, I am always striving to be a better me, but fuck it I mess up sometimes, my grammar is going to be jacked up, I like extra !!! and ??? and ... and this is my space. SO that's it... enjoy the journey with me!